Wow, what a busy week this has been! - NOT. Classes have been such a bludge that work in maths is actually making me happy D: The basic routine of the day is walk in, open laptop, kpoptumblrallkpopblog, end of class, begin next class, repeat. And no, it's not because I'm rebel or whatever- the teachers aren't really doing anything! Not that I'm complaining :S
I had an emotional breakdown today. No, not the dramatic, soap opera type. You see, it was in Maths and it started off with me fake laughing with Ms Crancher (we were discussing something that I totally did not care for) and yeah.. I couldn't stop. I could not for the love of god stop laughing. Tears were pouring out of my eyes like a waterfall and god, I could not stop. I was a maniac. I kept thinking of my leaving of Truong, my lack of childhood memories that I talked with Diem earlier in the day (i.e. not having a photo with Santa, not knowing about the Tooth Fairy, etc.) and yeah, I couldn't stop laughing and crying. WTF is wrong with me lately?
Crancher: Mitchell! Snap out of it! Find 5 colours around the room - that's how you calm down! Me: I'M COLOURBLIND!
I would like to use this post to make everyone aware that at this point in time, I have decided to leave Truong Tutoring. You guys already know the reasons for this so I won't repeat. I would just like to say this: Thank you Sir, Miss Lam and Mr Joseph for teaching so much these 5 years. I have learnt much more than maths and for that, I am forever grateful. Thank you.
I'm awaiting a confirmation from Peak maths anytime soon so yeah, I have my next 2 years of schooling planned out. I can now. finally. breathe.
On a lighter note, I went to Liverpool after school today in search of formal shoes! And wallah! Got these for $40 down from $80 :D And now, my formal outfit is complete!Labels: emotional breakdown, truong
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 It's getting more windy. It's getting more cold. Yet winter's going. What the fuck.
I'm feeling down. I'm not much of a conservative person but you know what today is? Today was my last day with my truong class :'( These kids have basically been with me since year 6 and we've gone through so many lessons, lectures, life teachings, exams and pressure together. And now what? I just hope I can keep a low profile so that truong won't kill me. I really need to get rid of this fear of him. This isn't good for my health. Let's just end this with a fake LOL to rid of the awkwardness between me and my non-existent readers. Yeah? Yeah.Thanks Miss Lam- you've really taught me a lot over the past years. You've put up with my stupidity, my consistent fails at exams, my questions and that dumb ass look I always have on my face when I'm confused. Thank you for knowing how to help me. Thank you for being so patient while I struggled. Thank you for pushing me so that I finally passed that god damnned exit exam that would have been the death of me and my hopes if I had failed like I usually did. Thank you.sorry for this crappy short post. I just don't feel like blogging. Labels: truong
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 So right now, I'm sitting at this computer desk, my truong papers, coke bottle, kpop through my speakers, lamp slowly burning my skin away and i'm thinking.. is it all worth it? Just a thought. I'm seriously considering my future at Truong. I have discussed it with my mother and I will be quitting truong after the June Exit Exam. As you guys know, truong is a huge part of my nonsense stress and seriously, i think it's affecting my mental health. I'm thinking of the very real possibilities of failure constantly. When I wake up, when I take the train to school, every time I talk to people like simon banh, michelle and wendy. Even in my dreams I am visualising the pain of failure. And dreams do come true- just in this case, I don't want it to. My results these past few tests have been the worst in my life. Like ever. So i'm wondering Is it all worth it? Is this worth all the hours of social isolation. Is this worth giving up my childhood. Is this worth missing out on trip to Vietnam, even a recent one where I would be honouring my Grandma's death. Is it really worth it to miss out on so much when in the end I will be receiving back a test full of red crosses, circles and blanks. Is it really worth it? So the plan is to keep going for now, try, oh god, try and complete the exit exam feeling as if i had done all i could. I need to feel that. Otherwise I will be in the one seriously contemplating the worth of my life. After that, i will be joining peak maths.. that is, if they allow me in. Wish me luck. I need it.
Labels: truong
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updated 10:46PM - i understand now. finally.
I HATE YOU. GET AWAY. YOU'RE FRUSTRATING. YOU'RE MAKING ME SLEEP-DEPRIVED. YOU'RE ANNOYING. I CAN'T THINK STRAIGHT.
FUCK YOU.
Labels: truong
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